Demon Hunters featuring Good ol' Chris Weiner - by McMichael
Chris: Hey, Jim.
Chris: Jim, what do you suppose Christmas is all about?
Jim: Ages ago, in the vast frozen wastelands of the North, a nomadic shaman performed a dark ritual on the eve of the winter solstice.
Jim: Our world was linked to another through a transdimensional portal, and the creature that stepped through would haunt the land for centuries to come.
Jim: With fur white as snow and teeth like daggers, it lay dormant for most of the year.
Jim: But on the eve of its summoning it would wake from its slumber and rush forth from its frozen home to feast on the blood of the innocent in the nearby village.
Jim: Leaping from house to house, the creature would tear through the wooden roofs, pulling out the villagers' children to be torn apart and consumed.
Jim: By evening's end, the creature's hunger sated, and its white fur matted red with blood, it would return to its alpine home to sleep for another year.
Jim: And as the villagers began to repair their homes with fresh cut trees, the creature's terrible howl would echo out across the valley. Ho! Ho! Ho!
Jim: And so the cycle would repeat for about four hundred years. Eventually the creature was killed by a Brotherhood agent, name of Kringle.

Jim: God bless us, every one.